Bike Terms and New Anatomy

8 08 2008

Yesterday was certainly an educational day.  As most of you who read my blog may know, I recently bought my first road bike, and I’m still learning about all the different mechanics, parts, techniques etc.
It’s no longer a case of just get on and pedal.

Anyway, I was chatting to my friend Nick who recently finished a very long ride; 172 miles over 3 days, about the benefits of a good bike seat, primarily for comfort purposes.

I’ve heard stories about men being “injured” from inadequate seating, from nerve damage sometimes severe enough to cause impotence.  As you can imagine, that’s something I’m very interested in avoiding.

Essentially it’s a bike seat that appears to have either a groove, or a vented area through the centre from mid front, to mid back.  I like to call it a “vag’ (pronounced vaj’) vent”.  I’m all about class you know! 😉

I learnt a new name for the area of one’s anatomy that rests on it yesterday.  “Taint”.

My mind went instantly (and don’t ask me why, I couldn’t tell you, even if I wanted to, I just don’t know) to taint as in the dictionary meaning (one of them): a trace of something bad, offensive, or harmful, and as you can imagine there’s a good chance there would be after sitting in the same place over 172 miles.

Apparently I was incorrect.

My questioning look (apparently it was more blank than questioning, but I’m in control of what goes in here 😉 ), required an explanation, and here it is.

“Taint” is the area of your anatomy that rests on this area of the seat.

*Insert another questioning look*

For the full effect, please use an Irish/Scottish accent here:

“’ It taint your asshole, and it taint your balls”…

LAUGH!  Consider me educated, and mightily entertained!  It’s no secret that I have a twisted sense of humour.

That’s it from me.  Happy Friday / Saturday / Olympic Opening Ceremony!

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