Sweet and Sour

29 11 2010

I got to go meet with my Cardiologist today for the first time in six months.  Six months which appears to have flown by a whole lot faster than I imagined that it would.  I must have been having fun.

The good news of the visit, I’m no longer in Congestive Heart Failure, but I do have a weak heart now.  Stronger than before, but still weaker than it should be, and since my last visit I’ve not improved, I’ve plateaued.  It’s not ideal, but I’ve not slid backwards either, so that’s my silver lining.

The outcome of the visit, I don’t have to go back for another six months and my medications have been increased in strength, but during that time I have to attempt to lose as much of the weight that I gained while I was ill as I can, increase my cardiovascular activity and stamina through working out, and hope for the best.  *fingers crossed*

The sour of it all, and in my mind it’s not that sour.  If there’s still no improvement I’ll be re-assessed, and may have to be surgically implanted with a defibrillator (similar to a pacemaker).  According to my Cardiologist there’s a chance that a) my heart just get so weak I drop dead, which I have no plans of doing any time soon, or b) my heart cease to conduct electricity properly, meaning that it may stop beating or begin to fibrillate, again seeing me drop to the floor dead.  Excited yet?  I am!
He also pointed out for the second option that there are no real signs or symptoms to warn of this eventuality, and that if he was to have 100 people stand in front of him, thirty of them could hit the floor dead.  As an option, or more aptly insurance, I can be fitted with the defibrillator, which would “jump start me” if my heart was to stop, or shock my heart back into a proper rhythm should it fibrillate.

Surprisingly enough I wasn’t at all horrified or shocked.  Through all of this I’ve kept upbeat and positive, and while I’m not dead, it’s all good.

So, for the next six months, I pull my finger out and see if I can’t make all the positive changes needed to get my heart back into a place where I don’t need bionics.  Should that not work properly, I’ll take the bionic option.

Aside from the death part, my incentive is this.  If I get the defibrillator fitted I can never again go on any ride that uses magnetic acceleration or breaking, and that would “break my heart”.  I love my rides.  Oh yeah, and my family…

Additionally, I’ve always wanted a tattoo, but have never been able to decide on what I wanted, or where to put it.  Now with all this heart stuff going on, I think I finally have an idea of what, and where.  There’s going to be some big changes! Smile

Chin up, facing forward, and not dead yet.  It’s all good!

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